The Return of the Pencil Sharpener

I have talked to you about the pencil sharpener at work right?  Two days ago it found its way back to my desk.   I looked at my co-worker who previously had the pencil sharpener in her area and told her she had until the end of the day to move it back… or I will return the favour. 

The next day my co-worker stupidly called in sick.   A whole day to plan and execute a plan without her getting in the way at her desk?  It was too good to be true.   So I moved the sharpener back over to her desk, I took pictures of my masterpiece but I didn’t get time to upload them.   So I put the pencil sharpener into her kleenex box.   She leaves it standing up, I cut a hole in the back and slid the pencil sharpener in and covered its back with binders and such.   (Man the pictures would be awesome right now).  

One co-worker suggested I not plug in the sharpener in case of accidental injury but I am confident that no injuries could occur.   So far we are an hour into the work day, she has taken one kleenex out and has not noticed anything!!

More rules:

13) Try things that she asks you to do e.g. lip balm – is this girl on crack?  why is she moisturing guy’s lips?

14) Blow kisses in the air (to her) – If you are gay

15) Give her a hug. – But be careful… maybe too much closeness for her too soon.

27) Offer her half your cookie – once again… this girl is weird.

5 Responses to “The Return of the Pencil Sharpener”

  1. whatigotsofar Says:

    13) what if she suggests using a tampon or birth control pills. Guys shouldn’t do that sorta thing.

    14) even gays don’t do that shit, fuck only little girls playing house do that shit

    15) sure, if she hugs my cock first

    27) soggy cookie?

  2. jingle Says:

    what a hit,

    I loved your delightful post.

  3. DarcsFalcon Says:

    The adventures of the pencil sharpener! The Kleenex box is an awesome hiding spot. 🙂

    More rules – actually, WIGSF cracked me up with his responses this time. 😀

    On a side note, I used to know a girl who referred to her vagina as “cookie.” So I kind of lost it when I saw the “soggy” line in the comments there. 😉

    • whatigotsofar Says:

      See Falcon, now you know what I require from a woman for me to hug her. And frankly, women just don’t seem to wanna pay that steep a price for my huggy goodness.

    • whatigotsofar Says:

      And soggy cookie is a game played by a group of lonely, horny and drug-affected teenage guys. It’s really a nasty game. There are no winners in the game, only losers and one really really sorry loser.

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