Bob’s Bomb Threat Procedures: 5 Easy Steps

Here is the 5 Step Bomb procedures I thought of yesterday:

1) Find bomb

2) Look at what colour wires the bomb has.

3) If there are no red wires then run out of the building very quickly yelling “Bomb!  Bomb!   Run for your lives!”

4) If there is a red wire, then cut the wire.

5) Start planning the parade that will be had in your honour, you are a hero!!

That is my 5 easy steps on what to do with a bomb at work.    I think that for now I will follow the steps that the safety officer in my building outlined but I might talk to him next week about changing the rules so that he can incorporate some of my suggestions.

#51 “101 Things to do before we die”  Learn another language

– French never really caught on with me.   I am not very good with other languages (WIGSF will say I am not very good with the English language, he could have a point) but a part of me wished that I could learn Italian.   My Grandparents would be happy if I had learned but I don’t think I am capable of completing this one.   😦

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4 Responses to “Bob’s Bomb Threat Procedures: 5 Easy Steps”

  1. whatigotsofar Says:

    For those who don’t know, Bob has this magical ability to mispronounce every last name. Even the easy ones. I would never expect him to get those polysyllabic Sri Lankan names, but he flubs all of them.
    Talking sports with this guy can be painful sometimes. “Hey WIGSF, did you see that Strarsburp guy?”
    “Who?”
    “Stephen Strarsburp?”
    “You mean Stephen Strasburg?”
    “Yeah yeah, him.”

  2. DarcKnyt Says:

    Sounds like you’ve got your hero’s path all chosen. 😉 While you’re at it, pick out a nice casket with a fancy lid — it will have to stay closed. (J/K. 🙂 )

    And I don’t see why you CAN’T learn Italian; it would take some effort, sure, but you could do it. I’d like to learn French and Japanese. Maybe one like Arabic or Mandarin too. I don’t know. I love langages and all things linguistic though. I say go for it.

  3. DarcsFalcon Says:

    I LOVE those bomb threat procedures! Those are awesome! Especially the parade part. 🙂

    I took French in HS, but I can barely remember any of it now.

    ROFL@WIGSF 🙂 But can he sing the lyrics to Barenaked Ladies “One Week”?

  4. yellowcat Says:

    I’m still sticking with #3. Red wire or not, I’m running screaming from the building.

    I took Spanish for years and even had the ‘Ah ha!” moment where it all clicked into place. Then I had no need to use it and forgot most of it. I still know enough that I can follow a very slow conversation in Spanish. Like last night when we nearly had a Mexi-revolution at the restaurant. I didn’t need a translator to know why the Mexicans were pissed off.

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